mallory ellen.
August 26, 2009
How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard. ~Carol Sobieski and Thomas Meehan, Annie
Today marks three whole years that my best friend died.
Sometimes I sit and think of her and cry.
or laugh.
or just shake my head at her silly personality.
I can’t wait to see her again.
But, then again, I have to wait.
Yet, If I didn’t have this sadness, I wouldn’t have gained a sister.
That’s not something I want to give away.
Even if it was taken from me.
Our plans to live on a cul-de-sac and make our kids be friends are gone.
I worry sometimes that I’ll forget.
I look at pictures to remember and try to hear her voice.
I refuse to forget.
She had so much life to live.
She is now more fulfilled than anything on this earth has to offer.
I’ve heard it called a beautiful sadness.
and it’s just that.
In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace, which he lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight making known to us the mystery of his will, according to his purpose, which he set forth in Christ as a plan for the fullness of time, to unite all things in him, things in heaven and things on earth. Ephesians 1.6-10
sustained.
August 24, 2009
Psalm 25.1
To you, O LORD, I lift up my soul. O my God, in you I trust.
Psalm 103.14
For he knows our frame; he remembers that we are dust.
This weekend I went home to spend some time with family. I went running a few times and spent most of that time thinking, praying, giving thanks… the neighbor “on the other side of the woods” behind my parent’s house has acres and acres of land that used to be a farm and still has corn fields. So Pacey and I ran all around his ‘farm’ and walked through the corn fields. It was just so peaceful… (I’m going to try to talk Bran into moving to Gilbert or something and owning a farm. Ha!) This week is usually an emotionally hard week. Wednesday will mark three years since Mallory died. In one word this week is always: tough. I continue trying to trick myself into thinking “it’s just another 26th day of the month” but it still hits me like a ton of bricks. I’ve learned to praise God for what He gave me… the best friend that was like a sister…instead of cursing Him for what was taken away. I don’t deserve the friendship that I had with Mallory, therefore I praise Him for letting me hold onto that friendship for three years. It’s so neat to watch God continue reassuring me. This weekend was so beneficial for the week coming up—simply time alone and time of rest was much needed. But then this morning, a guy came and spoke at chapel for work that had lost his son a year ago on August 8. He talked about the goodness of God and told a story that was “one of those stories” that reassures any doubts that God is in control and is so, so good. I love seeing God work in my heart and know that He is doing it just at the right time. Oh, how He loves us.
- Our new LG started last night… oh my, it’s going to be fun. We had Tim Tams from Australia, drank coffee for Jennings, prayed with one another, and talked about what we are going to be doing for this season. All of the New Testament read by Christmas? Done.
- Quotable: “They are so good! You put them in your mouth and chocolate melts down your throat! I had to shake with someone and make a deal to not eat them anymore for the rest of the time in Australia.” -Katie Holcombe(s)
- Faith is daring the soul to go beyond what it can see. -William Newton Clark
- Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. -Colossians 3.16
- Loving this.
- & why didn’t I think of this for my wedding? love it!
sometimes…
August 18, 2009
I wish I had this life.
